How to be possessive in a relationship

3 Ways to Be Less Possessive of Your Partner - wikiHow

how to be possessive in a relationship

Address relationship issues. In some cases, you may feel possessive because things have happened in the. How to Create a More Equal and Trusting Relationship. The subject of having a possessive or controlling relationship partner may feel worlds away from the. The subject of having a possessive or controlling relationship partner may feel worlds away from the sweet sentiment behind asking someone.

In fact, attempts to exercise power over our partners actually serve to reduce and diminish our own attraction to them. When we try to control someone close to us, we limit them in ways that make them less themselves.

We want our partners and ourselves for that matter to be fulfilled, well-rounded individuals who are fully alive. When we make our partner feel guilty for choosing to spend time with friends, for example, we actually shrink their world. Otherwise, we take the air and life out of the relationship.

So how can you stop the possessive patterns in your relationship? The first step is to understand why you engage in controlling behavior, and the second step is to deal with the underlying feelings that drive you toward an unequal dynamic.

how to be possessive in a relationship

Most of us have some degree of fear and insecurity surrounding our close relationships. These feelings can spring from deeper struggles we have with trust, low self-esteem, fears of rejection, loss or intimacy itself. These deep-seated emotions can lead to a desire to control.

Instead of exploring where these feelings come from, we tend to project them onto our partner and start acting out controlling behaviors that we hope will alleviate these painful feelings.

how to be possessive in a relationship

For example, we may on some core level feel unlovable or like no one would ever choose us. This negative self-concept can lead us to act out all kinds of jealous or insecure behaviors with our partner.

Be Mine: Dealing with Possessiveness in a Relationship - PsychAlive

We may act victimized and wounded by any comment or action that we can construe as disregarding or rejecting. All of these behavior patterns have a lot more to do with us than our partner. And most of them have deep roots in our past.

how to be possessive in a relationship

As children, we developed strategies or defenses in an effort to protect ourselves from difficult or painful conditions. These early experiences shaped our expectations about relationships and the defenses we formed then still play out in our lives today. Feeling claustrophobic means there is possessiveness.

how to be possessive in a relationship

Interrogating your partner implies you are possessive. Everyone has their little moments of emotional insecurity in a relationship. Everyone is possessive about their loved one. However, there are different ways in which people showcase their possessiveness in relationships. Some will be overtly possessive and give their partner no space in the relationship and some way employ passive aggressive methods to display their possessiveness.

Keep a tab on the following signs of possessiveness in relationships Are you Cyber Stalking? Cyber stalking is a sure shot sign of possessiveness in relationships. Is there no Space?

  • Signs of Possessiveness in Relationships

If either your partner or you are feeling claustrophobic in the relationship, then one of you has definitely hit the possessive button. This might take the form of name-calling, rudeness, sarcasm or critical remarks. Possessive partners may also disrespect your career or academic choices.

Jealousy Abounds A possessive person often expresses jealousy. He might become angry or upset when you socialize with friends, family or co-workers. Along with this, he may accuse you of cheating or be suspicious of innocent behaviors such as sending an email or a text message.

Danger Signs of Possessive Relationships

In extreme cases, your possessive partner may try to cut off your contact with friends and family because he is jealous of the time you spend with them. You Are Being Manipulated A possessive partner uses manipulative behavior. For example, your partner might threaten to leave you if you do not do exactly what he wants.